For Jimmy (this not for you Sharon. Go to hell!)
Spazmo
Dear Jimmy,
I made the house out of garbage in the back yard for a couple (very good) reasons so don’t let your mom tear it down. I know she’s gonna try so don’t let her. One reason I made it is cause the deserts of France, people make houses out of cow dung. Don’t laugh, now. TV said it don’t stink too bad cause it gets all hot in the sun and dries out and next thing you know it don’t stink at all. Trust your daddy on this one. When that garbage gets good and hot this summer, it’ll do the same. Just you wait.
I made that little house for you and those kids I saw you playing with the other day. Y’all can have a party or something. Don’t you let them boss you round none, hear? It’s your Goddamn house and I made it for you. You tell them that. Tell them I’ll come back and kick all their Goddamn asses. Daddy’s only gonna be gone for a while, ok? See, he’s got some real good ideas that are gonna take off once he gets somewhere people don’t treat you like shit for trying.
Your mama’s gonna tell you a lot of stuff about me when I’m gone and I’ll tell you it’s all a bunch of goddamn bullshit. I never hurt nobody, least of all her. Any of the stuff that …
I wake about an hour before I get up, and spend that time looking at myself in the bathroom mirror and weeping for all the people who will never get to see my perfect visage.
Then I go back to bed to work up the tears for the following morning.
I do collect the tears in little vials and test tubes, so if you’d like some, just say so.
And paypal me $99.95.
Recent Writing:
Five Questions: the Spazmo edition
Spazmo
The latest installment of our blog meme, five questions, has BishopX interviewing Spazmo:
1. Who would you say has most shaped your life?
My first thought here was to list all the men who helped me define who I am. Who did I model myself after? Who allowed me …
Continuing with our meme, this week BishopX answers Waterhouse’s five questions. 1. In a freak twist of fate, you’ve been declared President of the United States. What do you do? Provide details, even if it involves immediately getting drunk on power. Actually, especially if it …
Following is Murdered Duchess’s interview with Waterhouse in the latest edition of the blog meme, “Five Questions.”
1. Please compose an eloquent, succinct and succulent essay of stylistically compelling and grammatically immaculate prose* regarding three (3) of the following topics:
Following our blog meme from Ethan, we’re each taking turns asking five questions. This week, I (Lady Penelope) asked Gloveshot five questions. Here are his answers:
1. You’ve been married 31 years. Congratulations, that’s awesome! How did you propose to your wife? It …
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Dear Jimmy,
The latest installment of our blog meme, five questions, has BishopX interviewing Spazmo:
Continuing with our meme, this week BishopX answers Waterhouse’s five questions. 
Following is Murdered Duchess’s interview with Waterhouse in the latest edition of the blog meme, “Five Questions.” 
Following our blog meme from Ethan, we’re each taking turns asking five questions. This week, I (Lady Penelope) asked Gloveshot five questions. Here are his answers: 
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