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Darkness, not at noon

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“Don’t fancy yours much...” Roy says, nudging me hard in the ribs, his playful physicality overdubbed with four too many “Rolling Rock"s. “...nor mine, really.” There are two girls ahead of us. He’s right. We watch a bouncer eject a drugged-up older guy who has been flashing his penis on the dance floor and is now objecting loudly that he did no such thing. It’s clear that he is in the no-mans land, where he thinks bouncers can be reasoned with (not true), but knows that after ten pm he will not be allowed to enter any other drinking establishment (true). This is not his night, and he is tossed almost casually out in to the dreickt (see glossary below) evening street, genitals glistening under street lamp light. I start to wonder why you’d show your cock on the dance floor, of all places? To watch it jig? I quickly end those thoughts. A child of Morrissey, I know my genitals look like some grotesque, shameful, vile joke gone wrong. “Prity thing you is ugly and you is ment to hide.” as Billy Childish wrote.

In mid-80’s Glasgow street crime curfew is all the rage—while the bars can stay open ‘till midnight and the ‘niteclubs’ (ugh) ‘till three am, you can’t enter either after ten pm. Constant police patrols wander the city centre to ensure these rules are kept, while ignoring the clashes between the …

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She’s Bi-Polar, Roy

balderdash

She’s Bi-Polar, Roy.

That’s what we heard Allen say, but he was reading the CVS Pharmacy sale flyer which said “Buy Polaroid 600 film, get 2nd package ½ price”. The mind hears what it wants to, and She’s Bi-Polar fit better with my train of …

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En charette

Lady Penelope

I have a lot of stomach troubles as you by now know. If I eat this or that, something can go wrong, and I am frequently nauseated for a spell. I am not feeling well now, though I am better than yesterday, but worse than this morning. …

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Links

Monday, March 08, 2010


Wine is good for the waist
Booze/Pills/Candy Health • 0 Comments

Thursday, February 11, 2010


Get that night-before breath the morning after
Booze/Pills/Candy Buy-Me! History • 0 Comments

Friday, February 05, 2010


There is nothing like a little bit of quality father/daughter time.
Booze/Pills/Candy Fat-as-Fuck! • 0 Comments

Tuesday, February 02, 2010


Hey, those antidepressants you're taking? Less effective than a sugar pill. Or chocolate.
Booze/Pills/Candy Health • 2 Comments

Friday, January 22, 2010


Burger King adds beer to the menu at planned Whopper Bars
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Tuesday, January 19, 2010


Got Jugs? Get Booze!
Booze/Pills/Candy Business Fluff • 1 Comments

Friday, January 15, 2010


"I'm not the man they think they I am at home. Oh no no no I'm a rocket man ..."
Booze/Pills/Candy Whoops! • 4 Comments

Tuesday, January 12, 2010


Court orders cops to give dude back his sh!tload of pot
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Synth. booze may end hangover/addiction, but what fun is it unless I forget where I left my pants?
Booze/Pills/Candy Health • 0 Comments

Friday, January 08, 2010


I'm going on zapoi, everyone, see you in a week
Booze/Pills/Candy World • 0 Comments

Monday, January 04, 2010


NYC bashed for it's handy-dandy heroin guide
Booze/Pills/Candy • 4 Comments

Tuesday, December 08, 2009


SSRIs not only lift moods but change personality: a new you for the holidays!
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Monday, December 07, 2009


Playing chicken at airport security
Booze/Pills/Candy Crime Eat-Me! • 0 Comments

Wednesday, December 02, 2009


What the Harvard-Yale game is like
Booze/Pills/Candy Sport • 0 Comments

Monday, November 30, 2009


Best wishes to the Hasselhoff kids
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Tuesday, November 24, 2009


Dock Ellis & the LSD no-no
Booze/Pills/Candy Sport Video • 0 Comments

Thursday, November 19, 2009


Opium dens, San Francisco 1889
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Wednesday, November 18, 2009


Oy vey
Booze/Pills/Candy • 1 Comments

Monday, November 16, 2009


Because somebody ought to drink it: regarding the recovery of Ernest Shackleton's scotch
Booze/Pills/Candy History • 0 Comments

Friday, November 13, 2009


Another thing you don't need, or do need, depending how you look at it
Booze/Pills/Candy Buy-Me! • 0 Comments

Tuesday, November 03, 2009


Russia tries to rein in the vodka
Booze/Pills/Candy World • 0 Comments

Monday, November 02, 2009


Name your stash
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Thursday, October 29, 2009


Nothing conveys trust like a dog at home, at work, at school.
Beasties Booze/Pills/Candy Business Fat-Jerry • 0 Comments

Thursday, October 22, 2009


Minnesota man gets DUI on motorized La-Z-Boy. "The ladies loved him."
Booze/Pills/Candy • 2 Comments

Employment opportunity: US newspaper seeks pot critic
Booze/Pills/Candy • 2 Comments

Friday, October 16, 2009


Drunkest guy ever gets more beer (courtesy of Rumproast)
Booze/Pills/Candy Funny-Ha-Ha Video • 0 Comments

Wednesday, September 23, 2009


Alcohol: apply directly to the brain injury
Booze/Pills/Candy • 1 Comments

Tuesday, September 22, 2009


Duh.
Art Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Friday, September 18, 2009


"The Coolest Woman Alive!"
Booze/Pills/Candy • 1 Comments

Monday, September 14, 2009


The fake pharmacopeia to conquer all your symptoms
Booze/Pills/Candy • 1 Comments

Tuesday, September 01, 2009


Quietly last week, Mexico in an historic, enlightened, humane move, legalized personal drug use
Booze/Pills/Candy • 1 Comments

Tuesday, August 25, 2009


Meth just got easier to make (and more likely to explode in your face)
Booze/Pills/Candy Crime • 1 Comments

La Paz, Bolivia sports a movable feast of white powder: tourists, meet the cocaine bar
Booze/Pills/Candy • 1 Comments

Tuesday, August 18, 2009


Pick your poison
Booze/Pills/Candy Creepy World • 0 Comments

Friday, July 31, 2009


Japanese launch refreshing blue beer made from melting iceberg
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Thursday, July 30, 2009


White House beer summit becomes something of a brouhaha
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Friday, July 24, 2009


Mexican drug lords have inneresting names
Booze/Pills/Candy Crime Life • 0 Comments

Thursday, July 23, 2009


Californians start taxing marijuana
Booze/Pills/Candy Money Politics • 0 Comments

Friday, July 17, 2009


If you own a fridge just for beer, can't say I'm surprised you forgot where you put your cat...
Booze/Pills/Candy Cats • 0 Comments

Thursday, July 16, 2009


See, it was torture, because they didn't give him time to enjoy the fine ale ...
Booze/Pills/Candy Crime • 0 Comments

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


Here's how your social security money is being spent
Booze/Pills/Candy • 2 Comments

Sunday, July 05, 2009


Beer festival runs out of, um, beer
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Thursday, July 02, 2009


Diary from a recovering alcoholic
Booze/Pills/Candy Health Life • 5 Comments

Friday, June 19, 2009


Banding together for a great cause
Booze/Pills/Candy Politics • 0 Comments

Sashimi anyone?
Beasties Booze/Pills/Candy • 1 Comments

Wednesday, June 10, 2009


The nuns are after me!
Booze/Pills/Candy Foolhardy • 3 Comments

Saturday, June 06, 2009


DC is No. 1! DC is No. 1!
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Wednesday, June 03, 2009


Puritans, drunkards, and the problem of intoxication
Booze/Pills/Candy • 0 Comments

Monday, June 01, 2009


Tom Sizemore... keepin it real
Booze/Pills/Candy Crime • 1 Comments

Friday, May 29, 2009


How do you hold your glass?
Booze/Pills/Candy Life • 2 Comments

Thursday, May 28, 2009


You'll need more then a screwdriver to get into there buddy...
Booze/Pills/Candy Crime Foolhardy • 3 Comments

Tuesday, May 26, 2009


Till death do us part
Booze/Pills/Candy Reaping-Grimly Whoops! • 1 Comments

Friday, May 22, 2009


“Rx vs. XXX.”
Booze/Pills/Candy Sex • 2 Comments

Tuesday, May 19, 2009


Our future may involve more pee-cups
Booze/Pills/Candy Work • 8 Comments

Monday, May 11, 2009


FloriDUH
Booze/Pills/Candy Foolhardy • 1 Comments

Friday, May 08, 2009


Manny Ramirez suspended from MLB for trying to get pregnant? +
Booze/Pills/Candy Fat-as-Fuck! Funny-Ha-Ha Sex Sport • 1 Comments

Thursday, May 07, 2009


Kiefer Sutherland does a real life Jack B. for unknown reasons.
Booze/Pills/Candy Crime Fat-as-Fuck! • 1 Comments

Friday, April 24, 2009


Jim Webb puts marijuana legalization on the table
Booze/Pills/Candy Politics • 0 Comments

Tuesday, April 21, 2009


Baghdad rediscovers old pleasures, like scotch and valium
Booze/Pills/Candy Life World • 0 Comments

I say 'Show us your tits!' BELCH!
Booze/Pills/Candy Foolhardy • 0 Comments

Sunday, April 19, 2009


You are what you drink
Booze/Pills/Candy Health • 5 Comments

Tuesday, April 07, 2009


This could present a pretty big problem
Booze/Pills/Candy Health Sad Whoops! • 0 Comments

Friday, April 03, 2009


Moms gone wild...
Booze/Pills/Candy Creepy Crime Sex • 0 Comments

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