If I ever see an “Automatic Gratuity” on a guest check, I will never return. As a part-time pizza jockey, I earn my tips by being polite, timely, praising the dog , winking at the toddlers, taking pictures at the family reunions, catching the cat, etc. etc. etc…

I’ve never had the nerve to stiff a server for poor service. having worked in food service, I “know” that women don’t tip well, so even when I’m being treated really badly by a server I somehow feel obligated to tip at least 20% just to bust their preconceptions of how women behave. I hate myself sometimes.
Here is what I am determined to never forget: if I go to a restaurant and my server pulls the order book out of the back of their pants, I don’t care how hungry I think I am, I am leaving. Things never improve after that.
Also, I wish I lived on your route. My dogs are starved for praise.

I can’t stiff a server either. I can go lower, like 10 or 15%, if service is truly awful. I think the last time I did that was when the waitress shouted “Michael Vick! YEAH!” as she stood beside our table. I forgot to draw a picture of a puppy on my napkin to drive the point home.