Reminds me of the “XYZ” that rode into our small town in 1975. Was a bit of amphetamine and cocaine cut with just a touch of rat poison. I personally saw a guy take a machete to his sofa. One friend took a shotgun to his car. People kicked out windows, beat their heads bloody on concrete walls and sidewalks, got naked and ran screaming through the streets. Nobody did it a second time, and damn near everybody stayed straight for at least a week afterwards.

Local media started to mention bath salts last winter. I want nothing to do with it.

Awww, you were my second-most-likely-to-try, right after Spazmo…