I’m around, just busy at work. About to be un-busy shortly.

Where the eff is everyone?  Do I have to start talking about my new favorite nail polish color to get some yappin’ around here?

I can’t remember if you have curly hair, but one of the advantages of it is that, the longer you go without washing it, the better it looks.

I don’t think I need the vaseline.

I forgot ot wash my hair. How embarrassing.

Just slather it in Vaseline (or lard) and go as a totally new “Statement in the World of Fashion”.

Coco, sorry to hear you’re under the weather. Get well soon.

I forgot ot wash my hair. How embarrassing. And we have the work party today.

Bad weather never hits here bad enough so that I can’t drive to school every morning.

There’s always the “cat ate my car keys” approach.

At the risk of incurring the ruthless mockery of the fashionistas, my mom bought a pair of these (in her defense, for gardening):

I wore them today on the train, and damn, they are the most comfortable commute shoes evah. 

Don’t worry, I am now wearing pink kitten heels with pink kittens on the toes.  Couldn’t find a pic of said shoes, but did come across these:

All together now: “That’s hot.”

Oooh, and look: Crocs ballet slippers!

I’ve got a hell cold

Sorry to hear you’re under the weather hope you can kick it quickly. We’re suppose to have record heat today, we usually never go over 96 deg F.

Apparently the rest of New Zealand is either under water or snow.

Bad weather never hits here bad enough so that I can’t drive to school every morning.

The weather gods hate me.  It’s Talent Quest day tomorrow and I’ve got a hell cold, all I want to do is stay in bed for three days.  Maybe overnight the streets will freeze and I’ll be stuck.

If that happens I really will sing hallelujah three times.

And really, not a new beau.  We’re just meeting for coffee, and he’s practically given himself an aneurysm making it clear that he’s not looking for an LTR.  I’ve no objections.

Things, er, match.  But somehow, this reminds me of some sort of R-rated Far Side cartoon.  “Joan realized that ‘I love whips and chains’ could have more than one interpretation...”

About the new beau, did you find out if he’s a dom or sub? That might be a deal breaker for you if you don’t match…

Let’s hope the new beau isn’t a size queen.

I just got an email from myself to myself informing me that the more inches your penis has, the more times you are a man.

I was gonna say, Duchess; you could use a bigger penis.

Oh dimsy, you funny.

Man, he was driving me mentally insane.

Examples?

I need to get my ass to the gym.  I’m starting to get grandma arms.

Maybe the new, older BF will like those aspects though?

I just got an email from myself to myself informing me that the more inches your penis has, the more times you are a man.

Interesting.

She’s Satanic.

Just take the mirror off. No need to take the whole cabinet.

I didn’t go. Just hung around here like a lazy ass. Which is bad b/c I can’t go tomorrow or the next day, on account of scheduling conflicts. I am so bored, though. I really really am.

Speaking of mirrors, I wish the rest of the world thought I was as pretty as my bathroom mirror seems to.  I don’t know what it is, but I always look really cute in that mirror.  I’m thinking of taking the medicine cabinet with me when I leave.

Bored enough to go to the gym?  yikes.

Seeing myself in the mirror this morning made me realize that I need to get my ass to the gym.  I’m starting to get grandma arms.

I’m bored. I’m playing with the notion of going ot the gym. I swore this morning I wouldn’t go, on account of my foot’s acting up again, but I am soooooooooooooo bored.

So, anyhoose...how is everyone?  I’m trying not to capitulate to the urge to cut my lunch break short in order to plow through this pile of manuscripts on my desk.

My rule of thumb is, if it doesn’t stink or if it’s cheese and hasn’t gone brown & black, it’s probably edible. I have tested this repeatedly with no apparent ill effects.

Good, cuz I already done eated them.

Awhiles. You should be good.

Hello katz, kittenz and assorted unidentifiable wildlife:

I am now semi-officiamically a home owner.  Said “home” has been deemed in living condition and I have Signed My Life Away.  We did the inspection yesterday.  There is a renter living there at the moment, so closing will have to wait until August.  The tenant is not included in the amenities that come with the apartment, which is unfortunate, as he was super hot.

Also, I would like to express my complete and utter disgust at the fact that people now seem to be French manicuring their toenails. 

Also, there’s a little container of mixed nuts on my desk that’s been here since Friday.  Think they’re still edible?  I’m starving.  What’s the shelf life of nuts?

Being rude enough to refuse coffee, myself, I think you did fine. While it might have been amusing to slap the bf silly, it would have been a more serious breach of etiquette than leaving without consuming things you didn’t want.

I went round to a friend’s place for dinner tonight and I’ve just realised how rude I probably was.  I left before the coffee and cake. 

I hate coffee and cake at the end of a meal but I hated her boyfriend more.  Man, he was driving me mentally insane. I had to leave before I told him to just shut.the.fuck.up. 

I did help tidy up before I left.  I’m not a completely uncouth dinner guest.

I’ve also got bids on this, this, and this.

This tickles my fancy

God I need an early night.  Maybe tomorrow.

I’m still going for the clock.  But a different clock this time.

Front page better, all is good in FatJerrystan.

But the Cooler seems all better.

Just any FYI, some comment links on the main page are not functioning, or are functioning very slowly. other respond without incidence.

and a little less on Sunday.

Well, yeah, they got to give you time off for Church, rite?

Sorry to hear of your shitful work assignment, LP.

Tip o’ the day: when shaving, and you see you are redoing a bit you’d already done, lift the blade before moving it horizontally to the next stubbly area. Ouch ouch ouch and blood all over my chin.

I guess I’ll go work out. Sigh.

God I’m bored.

I’m not going to have time there to afford anything. I’ll pretty much work from ten to ten, I think, Friday and Saturday, and a little less on Sunday.

Philly’s not so bad if you can afford it.

I’m spending the weekend in Philly. I could dream up no excuses. What was I thinking? Argh.

Well, I just got IRS audited (apparently), so I owe $290 for 2003, $14,000 for 2002, and $86,000 for 2004.

I paid all of these (well, my accountant cut that $60k bill in half) years ago: now I have nothing. Look any day now for the IRS selling small slivers of dimmer on eBay… Fuck.

On the happy side, they seem open to accepting it was their fault, I just have to do the yadda yadda.

Seems I’ve missed ~four dimmer towel off sessions

Hey, just send your address and $50 and you can have them. Signature of reality as well.

I need an excuse.

I’m bridesmaid at a wedding.
I’m leading the toast at a wake.
I’m fluffing for “Shaved and Oiled Secerataries” volume six.
I’m working with the differently abled children.
I’m -totally- gasping for a shag, so fuck you!

I’m a fair guy, but this f*cking heat is making me absolutely crazy.

Tell your boss if it’s Vegas he’s got a deal.